|Posted by SheWillNotFall on January 12, 2013 at 1:55 PM|
I just got done reading “The Fault In Our Stars” by John Green. (Pretty good book, by the way) In it, one of the main characters ***SPOILERSPOILER SPOILER*** dies. He passes from cancer, so he had a heads up that his time was coming. (Which would still suck) He comes up with this “pre-funeral” (a funeral before his actual funeral, so that way he could attend it) idea where he asked his girlfriend, and best friend to write a eulogy and they would read it in front of him. So right there, in the “literal heart of Jesus” (book reference) in the middle of the night, they had his pre-funeral.
It got me thinking, how cool would that be? To know who showed up, who cried, who wrote something, who spoke, who was angry? And I mean, who knows? Maybe when our time comes and our funeral happens, perhaps we do know the answers to all of these things… And then, that got me thinking. (It is best to just not get me thinking at all) How many people don't get to say “Good-bye” at all? How many sentences are left unsaid? Tasks left undone?
Every second of every day, we are all essentially seconds away from our death. The only things that save us are God, and our last minute decisions. (Forgetting our wallet in the house, taking a right turn instead of a left, deciding to go to Target instead of Wal-Mart)
“Normal” people do not think about these things on a daily basis, it’s only the people who have “cheated death” that realize these things,because they are the ones who have actually been there. They are the ones who have been milliseconds away from leaving this Earth. They are the ones who were left with the decision, “Go into the light, or back to my friends and family?”
The scariest thing about what happened to me on December 26,2012, was that I became unresponsive, but I do not remember being unresponsive. Does that make sense? I do not remember laying there while my friends and family were crying, trying to get me to come back. I have no recollection of just staring at each of their faces, and having no idea of who they are. I could not imagine what it must of felt like to be in their shoes that night. What if I went into cardiac arrest? What if I went into a coma? What would happen to my friends, family, and everything that I left undid? If I knew I was dying, what would I say at my “pre-funeral?”
I think one of the first things that I would say would be, do not be angry at God. Do not stop believing, do not give up, and don’t stop going to church. His will is perfect. All things happen for Him, through Him, and by Him. Everything He does is on purpose, for a purpose. Yeah, you will miss me, and it might suck, but ultimately I am better off. Think of it this way, (if I do not start walking before my time on Earth is over, then I will no longer need a wheelchair. And I think I’ll be pretty hot too) ;]
Another thing I would mention would be my friends and family. They are and will always be the best anybody could ever want or ask for. I don't know too many people who have friends who would drop everything that they are doing, say “screw sleep” and show up at the hospital at 3AM just to be there to support you, pray over you, and be there just in case anything happened. My family has always supported me in everything that I have ever wanted to do, and they never stopped encouraging me in pursuing my future dreams. All of my SEKs (South Euless Kids) have been there for me, most since the second grade. They have always been there to listen, or to help me out with any of my problems. I never have to ask twice. The only thing they ask, “When and where?” and they’ll be there. There are not enough words to adequately describe what my friends and family mean to me and how much of a role they have played in my life. I want them to never go a day without telling themselves how much I love them.
If something ever happens to me, and I have left any relationship strained, whether it was me being mad at you, you being mad at me, ect/whatever; I would want you to know that I forgive you. That even if I am not there to say the words to your face, I still mean them.
I am obviously not getting too in depth in this because itis sad thinking about your own death, but I think that everyone should at least give it some thought. I do not want to leave this Earth without everyone knowing what they have done for me, and how much they mean to me. I do not want to leave any strained or wrecked relationships behind, because that has the ability to tear people apart.